Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
Randomize
