roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
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