Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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