I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
Randomize
