It's Friday. Sex?
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
A guy from tinder a while ago who sent me dick pics straight out the gate is a tech on my dad's hospital floor. I was wondering why he looked familiar and why he never took my dads vitals when I was in the room
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
we should paint friendship bongs
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