I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
Randomize