You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
Buhtt sex?
dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
You're having sex and i just smoked and made oatmeal...i'll give you some time to be jealous
If you dedicate your next bite to me, I'll dedicate my first orgasm to you.
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
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