he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
