is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
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