Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
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