Segways are the fanny packs of transportation. Useful in some situations, but you always look like a tool when using one.
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
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