Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
Buhtt sex?
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
Randomize
