normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
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