is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
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