Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
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