Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
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