How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
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