i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
Hi, this is a test of the morning after apology broadcast system. If you're receiving this pre-recorded message there is a high probability I was a dickwad to you in the past 24 hours. You have my utmost and sincere apologies. Also if you have my wallet, house key, left converse, or lighter, give them/it back
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
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