i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
Randomize
