I don't usually arrange sex via text message
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
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