a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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