I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
This is drunk me apologizing to sober me in advance.. I am sprry about you're trashed house. Mom an dad will be home by 5 so get up and clean. P.s. Mike is in the closet passed out.
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
Randomize
