I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
Randomize