Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
if you are receiving this text, you are one of the people i hate
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
Just had the moment before I realised I'd packed you off in an ambulance last night after funnel-feeding you Monster and vodka. Your mom thinks I'm a dick doesn't she?
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
Randomize
