How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
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