hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
I'm curled up in a ball on the floor of my office with the lights off. I hope no one notices. No more open bar. Woof.
I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
