About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Randomize
