A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
Randomize
