He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
areolas are like halos for boobs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
I was going through my mom's stuff to find her xanax, and I found her vibrators instead. Plural. That is like the opposite of what I wanted.
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
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