tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
Randomize
