last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
I'm so stoned I just sat here for like at least 45 min thinking about how I would get some jack in the box tacos if only I knew where my wallet was and then I kind of blinked and finally noticed I had literally been staring at my wallet the ENTIRE fucking time
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
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