But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
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