We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
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