you guys were way drunker than both of me
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
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