respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Randomize
