I'm going to jail i love you
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
note to self: an IV pole is no substitute for a stripper pole. Written it on my ankle cast.
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
I may have just made our entire microwave glow green. Like big green. Like spark and make me shit green.
Like worse than the time I blew up the microwave with the egg green.
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
Randomize
