brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
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