"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
I was the only one at the party that didn't get their name taken by the police. I'm convinced that I'm the main character of Ferris Bueller's Drunken Adventures.
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Randomize
