if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
What happened to fro yo and sex?
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
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