I think my fart just growled at me.
I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
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