giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
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I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
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Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
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