Drinking non-alcoholic beer is like going down on your cousin.
Sure it tastes the same, but it ain't right.
that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
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