Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
Randomize
