No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
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