There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.