Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
It's been two dates and she just invited me to her aunts funeral. I can't even. Who the fuck does that? I need to drink I'm coming to get you in 5
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.