This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
I wish you could order shots online.
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
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