It's like God shit irony all over that family
Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live