So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
while you were getting the key to the dorm from the lobby i was giving a drunk monolog to the security camera about my life
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
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