i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
This was the first funeral I've ever attended where I had to pee behind a bush cuz someone was passed-out drunk in the locked bathroom. Steve would have been proud.
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
Randomize
