Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
Was having a panic attack, but I'm out of xanax. Substituting with vodka shots and breathing exercises. My therapist will be proud, yes?
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
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