Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
Randomize
